Jay Budzynski wrote:

The Thumbs mean nothing-and with hypnotic hallucination all I see when I get a thumb down is a nice set of boobs in the place of the thumbs down- so if people want to give me thumbs done please do, I am working on adding a collection, so the thumbs down with give more practice. so my post was and is in jest- I think you have come a long away from where you was a little while ago, and I sent you a PM, the other day to give you a pat on the back as you know, keep doing what you are doing its good, to see you being the you, that you can be,

MMMMMMM more thumbs please.

J

I can tell you where to stick that thumb.....HA HA HA

Hi Mark,

I would like to add somethings.

-about the T-shirts "I am single...", get real, before you do anything for a lady (presents and such) ask yourself this simple question: Am I doing it for her or for myself????

If what you are doing is done in order to get a response from her to like you or think how funny you are, then you did it for YOU, not for HER. That is to fuel your righteus ego. All of your approaches are ME ME ME, what about her?.

If you would like to do something for someone then do it for her and not with the outcome (for yourself) in sight.

Again in your posts you show your planings are just a puzzle you have figured out to be perfect and one of the pieces missing is a woman, even if you force a piece (woman) into the puzzle like that, it is not going to work in the long run (if you are that lucky to get past the short and medium run).

Now for a change and experimentation, please leave your bible home, go to an atheist meeting, or any kind of meeting unrelated to any of your current interests and go along without telling anybody anything about you, ask some questions and try some of them beliefs on, see if you can tell any difference in terms of true freedom or natural behaviour.

The only rule is DO NOT TALK ABOUT YOURSELF, that is what you allways do and its boring to the ladys anyway. Couldnt hurt, could it? ASK ASK ASK.

You have a lot to offer, do not deny girls that are not Christian the opportunity to meet you...(and dont narrow your chances either.)

Go places you would not normally go, just for the fun of it, not telling you to do anything crazy although that might also help you break the stiffness you put yourself in.

Good luck Job.

Roberto

Hello all! Sorry for the lack of an update but I have an extremely good reason, actually several of them.

I followed the 30 day plan exactly as it was written out except for the final fourth week, and I was able to do that partially. I have done everything including look for new employment, already have had one interview which I apparently bombed and am working on another good possibility. This weekends plans will be applying to more open positions and most likely helping my friend give his car a tune-up.

I did go to a party at the weekend between the third and fourth weeks where I introduced myself to several new young ladies and really enjoyed myself. I even got to witness my ex make a royally humiliating spectacle of herself in front of both of her parents, something I am forced to admit was extremely entertaining and satisfying at the same time and it was made all the better by the fact that I did not have to lift a finger or say a word. She did it all herself.

I introduced myself to one of the previously mentioned young ladies and after being responsible for a great deal of her laughing and merry-making during the evening asked her out on a date that coming Wednesday. She agreed. I then called her on the day of the date and got her voicemail. The mutual friend who introduced us volunteered to call her and see what was going one as well (she contacted me of her own volition and offered, I only agreed to let her call the other young lady and find out what was going on). I received nothing but silence from both of them regarding the issue and it remains that way to this day. This is the usual response I get from women but I did try my best.

It was probably for the best because the next three weeks proceeded to slam me with a total of $4400 in unexpected and unpredictable expenses. I have now gotten to the point where I have either started to recover from that or significantly dealt with them for the time being.

I also lost my very nice digital camera and that is preventing me from taking a few other pictures that could help with getting back into the online dating thing as planned. I will be rectifying that within the next two weeks by upgrading my phone to a new Blackberry Bold that will have a camera installed that is at least half of what my old one was. It will also make it more convenient for me to get nice pictures for social proof to place in the online profiles. At the same time I will be downgrading my plan to save me some money that I plan to redistribute towards taking nice young ladies out on dates if given the opportunity.

I also did not return to church as I had planned mainly due to being busy up to my ears dealing with all of the previously mentioned unexplained expenses. I am however making steps towards that and am considering doing so this coming Wednesday or within the next few weeks as I further recover financially.

I felt after all of your effort you friendly people deserved at least some kind of update, and if things had gone as planned would have received it a good two or three weeks ago.

eliansito wrote:

Roberto

Hey, Roberto, how are you out down there? Long time...

D

Mark,

It sounds like you're doing really well. The only suggestion I have is not to worry too much about spending money on dating nice young ladies. If they're interested in getting to know you they'll want to hang with you and do just that. Keep it simple at first. Get together for coffee or a soda at an interesting place and talk. Go for a walk in a park. Or visit interesting shops together (like antiques or something)--you don't have to buy anything, just look around. It gives you something to talk about and to do with your hands. For your next "date" why not just redbox it and watch a funny video at your place? You can spring for the popcorn, if you like. Another time offer to make dinner at your place. She might like to make dinner with you.

With truly nice young ladies it's not about the money you spend on them. It's about the time you spend together and how much fun you have while you're doing it.

Good luck!

Venus

venus_brown wrote:

With truly nice young ladies it's not about the money you spend on them....

I wish someone had told me this about 500 years ago.

John

The real reason you can't take it with you is that it goes before you do

venus_brown wrote:

Mark,

It sounds like you're doing really well. The only suggestion I have is not to worry too much about spending money on dating nice young ladies. If they're interested in getting to know you they'll want to hang with you and do just that. Keep it simple at first. Get together for coffee or a soda at an interesting place and talk. Go for a walk in a park. Or visit interesting shops together (like antiques or something)--you don't have to buy anything, just look around. It gives you something to talk about and to do with your hands. For your next "date" why not just redbox it and watch a funny video at your place? You can spring for the popcorn, if you like. Another time offer to make dinner at your place. She might like to make dinner with you.

With truly nice young ladies it's not about the money you spend on them. It's about the time you spend together and how much fun you have while you're doing it.

Good luck!

Venus

Quite right. Mark is his own biggest resource. And his most valuable. We all are. He should look for someone who can and does see that, and not bother with people who can't or won't. There are lots of good ladies out there, lots of good people. Play to your strengths.

D

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting a different result. In an attempt to end this endless cycle of misery I did try something different and certainly got a different result.

I know this young girl that opened up to me two nights ago, she is a good friend I have known for well over a year and is someone I do care about. She was upset because she has suddenly realized she is 23, has had 12 boyfriends since she was 16, and is not even close to finding someone while all of her friends are either getting married, having children, or both. Her situation is one I can intimately appreciate for reasons that should be obvious by this point. So I took a chance.

By her own admission she has missed spending time with me and so it was easy to set up a date. I wore my new blue suit and did everything in my power to take what I have learned here so far. I let her pick where we ate and everything we did, if she did not know what she wanted I offered choices but she ultimately chose what we did.

Out in the car before we went into the movie theater I made her an offer I have not made any other woman. The offer was simple; I would try to be that person for her. I offered her, honesty, affection (I tried to imply sexual as well if she so desired), and loyalty. I chose to make the offer right after a nice dinner and just before we got out of the car and into the movie theater. I did not know what to expect, anything from acceptance (I hoped) or an angry slap in the face (I hoped not) but I was prepared to go all the way if she even gave me a hint that she would want to do that. What I got threw me.

As soon as I said loyalty she interrupted me and said she was not loyal. When I reiterated the point that I was offering the one thing she claims to have never had and that I wanted to be loyal to her she responded by saying she did not know I would be loyal.

I admit I was stunned for a couple of seconds but I recovered quickly. I turned to face her in the seat a little more, showed both of my palms and looked her right in the eye and said in as definite tonality as can "I'm loyal". I then repeated those two words again and held her gaze the entire time. She broke off, not me.

This girl knows of my past relationship issues; we even dated for about a month and a half earlier in the year. She is also aware that most of my relationship problems stem from the fact I cannot find someone to be loyal to and who will be loyal to me and what I have always wanted is to find that one woman.

We enjoyed the movie, during which she declined popcorn when I offered to buy her one but I got an order with refills and made three trips back for more though I only consumed one of them.

We ended the night at her place. I stayed for about 35-40 minutes but nothing developed. We just watched a little TV with her roommate and then I left because I was truly growing tired and we both work tomorrow though she works mornings unlike me.

I really did enjoy myself and I have got her to half commit to doing something together again next week where I will cook for her and then we will do something else so far unnamed.

For what it is worth I am trying.

As soon as I said loyalty she interrupted me and said she was not loyal. When I reiterated the point that I was offering the one thing she claims to have never had and that I wanted to be loyal to her she responded by saying she did not know I would be loyal.

I admit I was stunned for a couple of seconds but I recovered quickly. I turned to face her in the seat a little more, showed both of my palms and looked her right in the eye and said in as definite tonality as can "I'm loyal". I then repeated those two words again and held her gaze the entire time. She broke off, not me.

Hi Mark. One thing you should be really appreciated for, is that you understood a concept ("if you do what you have always done, you'll get what you have always gotten") and better still, you courageously acted upon it. That's very bold and definitely worth admiring.

The next thing is, you adopted an attitude of learning towards the result and I think, you seem to look upon it as feedback. And it is. You just have to look further and see how you can get a still better result. This is how we all learn, Mark.

Some things that pop into my mind as I read your post (I have only read your recent post) is that you didn't have to state explicitly to the lady that you are loyal. At least, you know that when you attempted to so the first time, she interrupted and clearly showed that she is not interested in such dialogue. You might have taken that as feedback and changed your response accordingly. From what I see, she is clearly not interested in you telling anything with respect to what she looks in a man. You see, Mark, people have certain evidence procedures set up in their minds to discern what things mean when certain events happen. May be, the lady is looking for loyalty as the most important criterion in her man, but she may not want her man to verbally say it to her. May be her evidence procedure is what she sees her man is doing, not what she hears. It could be a possibility that if you show her that you are loyal by your actions, covertly, she will pick up the cues and you may start getting positive responses from her.

You did something repeatedly, telling her verbally that you are loyal and that you are the man she can trust, but you got the same result over and over again. You must develop the sensory acuity to note that the concept that you wanted to adopt, was working at that very moment, and have the flexibility to change your behaviour accordingly.

I know almost nothing about seduction or impressing girls. So, whatever I say is from the premise of NLP and nothing more. I would urge you to see the whole experience just as a learning opportunity and move on. Do not be disheartened. You will succeed if you persist.

All the best.

ReptilesBlade wrote:

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting a different result. In an attempt to end this endless cycle of misery I did try something different and certainly got a different result.

I know this young girl that opened up to me two nights ago, she is a good friend I have known for well over a year and is someone I do care about. She was upset because she has suddenly realized she is 23, has had 12 boyfriends since she was 16, and is not even close to finding someone while all of her friends are either getting married, having children, or both. Her situation is one I can intimately appreciate for reasons that should be obvious by this point. So I took a chance.

By her own admission she has missed spending time with me and so it was easy to set up a date. I wore my new blue suit and did everything in my power to take what I have learned here so far. I let her pick where we ate and everything we did, if she did not know what she wanted I offered choices but she ultimately chose what we did.

Out in the car before we went into the movie theater I made her an offer I have not made any other woman. The offer was simple; I would try to be that person for her. I offered her, honesty, affection (I tried to imply sexual as well if she so desired), and loyalty. I chose to make the offer right after a nice dinner and just before we got out of the car and into the movie theater. I did not know what to expect, anything from acceptance (I hoped) or an angry slap in the face (I hoped not) but I was prepared to go all the way if she even gave me a hint that she would want to do that. What I got threw me.

As soon as I said loyalty she interrupted me and said she was not loyal. When I reiterated the point that I was offering the one thing she claims to have never had and that I wanted to be loyal to her she responded by saying she did not know I would be loyal.

I admit I was stunned for a couple of seconds but I recovered quickly. I turned to face her in the seat a little more, showed both of my palms and looked her right in the eye and said in as definite tonality as can "I'm loyal". I then repeated those two words again and held her gaze the entire time. She broke off, not me.

This girl knows of my past relationship issues; we even dated for about a month and a half earlier in the year. She is also aware that most of my relationship problems stem from the fact I cannot find someone to be loyal to and who will be loyal to me and what I have always wanted is to find that one woman.

We enjoyed the movie, during which she declined popcorn when I offered to buy her one but I got an order with refills and made three trips back for more though I only consumed one of them.

We ended the night at her place. I stayed for about 35-40 minutes but nothing developed. We just watched a little TV with her roommate and then I left because I was truly growing tired and we both work tomorrow though she works mornings unlike me.

I really did enjoy myself and I have got her to half commit to doing something together again next week where I will cook for her and then we will do something else so far unnamed.

For what it is worth I am trying.

I don't even know where to begin to explain how this date went wrong. Let me just say, if you want to get laid, supplicating is not the way to go.

Pledging loyalty is in the arena of knights plighting their troth to maidens way back when. Kind of sweet, also v creepy. Especially on a first date. But hey, at least you got a date. What will you do differently next time?

adrian r wrote:

Pledging loyalty is in the arena of knights plighting their troth to maidens way back when. Kind of sweet, also v creepy. Especially on a first date. But hey, at least you got a date. What will you do differently next time?

Hopefully he'll offer challenges so that she'll be intrigued by him and he won't let her choose EVERYTHING.

ReptilesBlade wrote:

For what it is worth I am trying.

Perhaps you need to stop trying and just have some fun with people instead. There are people I know who do nothing else. Enjoy living in the moment for a while and stop worrying about the future. You seem to have been doing a lot of planning recently, now might be a good time to take a break from it.

My belief is people, especially women (perhaps some might like to confirm this) like to be with other people who are fun to be with. Intensity comes later once a friendship has developed, possibly.

Would it have been possible to have some light-hearted chit chat, enjoy the movie, make some jokes at her place and go home thinking that was a great night with her thinking the same?

It sounds like it was an ordeal.

John

Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?

What exactly do you mean by loyalty?

z8000783 wrote:

My belief is people, especially women (perhaps some might like to confirm this) like to be with other people who are fun to be with. Intensity comes later once a friendship has developed, possibly.

[/FONT]

John is so right!!

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OTtelwOgscM&feature=related]YouTube - Cyndi Lauper - Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (Music Video)[/ame]


We love fun - I saw the results of a survey about what is most important to us in a mate and the biggest slice of the pie chart said FUN!! Maybe you can find that on google, but it's true we love fun.

John,
Far be it for me to disagree with something you wrote because you are a genius, but I think it would be more accurate to say that "intensity comes later when comfort is developed." My experience shows that once you enter the "friendship" zone, that's where it ends. It doesn't progress to anything sexual from there; the boundries have already been established. Once comfort is established, things can get physical. Not that there's anything wrong with being friends or anything like that, don't get me wrong, I'm just stating how things progress.

Carol wrote:

What exactly do you mean by loyalty?

John is so right!!

We love fun - I saw the results of a survey about what is most important to us in a mate and the biggest slice of the pie chart said FUN!! Maybe you can find that on google, but it's true we love fun.

...and there was I thinking you were being serious.

Back to the drawing board.

John

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal particularly in women and chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible

Mark

What exactly do you mean by loyalty?




John

z8000783 wrote:

...and there was I thinking you were being serious.

Back to the drawing board.

John

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal particularly in women and chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DKKuQ1Uk9Hw&feature=related]YouTube - Mercedes Benz Timeless - SL class[/ame]


Are you serious you thought I was being serious?

Carol wrote:

Mark

What exactly do you mean by loyalty?



John


Are you serious you thought I was being serious?

Are you seriously suggesting I was mistaken in my perception that you were not pretending to be serious?

John

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live

Carol wrote:

Mark

What exactly do you mean by loyalty?




John

To be faithful and loyal to each other. This sums it up better than I could.



I _____, take you ______, to be my wedded wife. To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish 'till death do us part. And hereto I pledge you my faithfulness.



I was always brought up to believe that is the end result, the point if you will, of getting into a relationship. When I made my offer during the date I was trying in my very clumsy and inexperienced way to give her a chance at that, which I believed she was telling me she wanted.

So the lesson I can take from this is that the only things that really matter is how much money you have and how much fun you can have? Honesty, faithfulness, and everything in my quote above means nothing.

If that is the case then I am playing a game I cannot win. There will always be someone who can outspend me or have more fun than me simply because there is a physical limit to nearly everything I do and if I pass that limit the consequences can be dire.

Sorry, I am clearly in a very bad mood over this. I feel as if someone has played a very cruel joke on me and everyone is laughing but myself.