I have joined this site specifically to get help with the exercises in Change Your Lifein 7 Days; a process I'm struggling with. As the stuff is based on NLP (as is my understanding) I have bee searching the net for a suitable site. I've tried discussing this on other forums, but noone really is familiar enough with the books, or at least the techniques. Hence posting here. If I could get some advice I would be very grateful. A lot of the exercises seem to involve imagining things I find difficult; for instance I can't remember a time I felt especially happy - happy enough that it engenders commensurate happiness I can then anchor and build upon. Or confidence, for instance. The first exercise is hard enough: visualise your authentic self and then merge with the positive qualities of that being. Though I don't find visualisation per se particularly difficult or hard to understand, this exercise I do. What does my authentic self look like? I don't know! When i try and generate something i don't get much of a response and subsequently no positive feelings i can merge with are generated. This experience seems key to the whole process and I'm stuck on it! Thanks for any and all responses in advance.

What about the hypnosis CD that comes with the book? Are you listening to it regularly? If you have trouble with visualisation, Paul's excellent hypnosis CD will definitely help you.

Vivek.

Vivek Venugopal wrote:

What about the hypnosis CD that comes with the book? Are you listening to it regularly? If you have trouble with visualisation, Paul's excellent hypnosis CD will definitely help you.

Vivek.

I listen to it every morning, but it doesnt make the exercises any easier. I noticed he starts to do the exercises on the cd as well, but he moves so fast it's impossible to follow; once i start trying to follow him telling me to visualise whatever he's on to the next thing on the disc. I don't have trouble with visualisation per se, just these exercises. How do you visualise your authentic self? What does that mean? I have no ie what that would look like and trying to merge with whatever appears doesn't really inspire feelings of anything.

wishface wrote:

How do you visualise your authentic self? What does that mean? I have no ie what that would look like and trying to merge with whatever appears doesn't really inspire feelings of anything.

Authentic self is quite a 'chunk up' - it's abstract and ill defined as a term, but it's an invitation to see yourself as you would be if you were operating with all the resources you have and want. If it was more specifically defined it may be too leading and therefore limiting. You say you visualise well, how about playing with some images and movies of yourself with different physiologies, noticing facial expressions, tensions in various parts of your body, posture, voice tones etc etc - and just try them on till you find the one that looks, feels, sounds most 'authentic'.

I don't have this book and haven't seen the exercises in it so I may be off on a tangent

Isn't seeing myself superficial? Surely the clothes i wear and the haircut i have is irrelevant. so what am i trying to look at with this visualisation? A man in a sharp suit? A nice clean shaven face?

wishface wrote:

Isn't seeing myself superficial? Surely the clothes i wear and the haircut i have is irrelevant. so what am i trying to look at with this visualisation? A man in a sharp suit? A nice clean shaven face?

I have read Paul's other books but not this one. It is not necessary that listening to the CD regularly will make your visualisation a lot more easier. The CD is intended to change and re-program your unconscious patterns. Visualisation is a skill which you can develop through exercises. I am doubtful whether you are really not able to visualise. Most probably, you are just questioning too much about the symbols you see in your visualisation and being too critical about them. A nice suit or a hair-cut may or may not be irrelevant. What you need to keep in mind is that every aspect of your visualisation has a symbolic meaning with regard to your unconscious. So, it is not so helpful to be too critical about it and it pays to be respectful to it. What do you see in your mind when you are in your best self? How do you look and behave when you are at your peak? You see yourself in sharp suit? Good. No? That's fine too. What is important is how well you are able to communicate with your unconscious.

Vivek.

Vivek Venugopal wrote:

I have read Paul's other books but not this one. It is not necessary that listening to the CD regularly will make your visualisation a lot more easier. The CD is intended to change and re-program your unconscious patterns. Visualisation is a skill which you can develop through exercises. I am doubtful whether you are really not able to visualise. Most probably, you are just questioning too much about the symbols you see in your visualisation and being too critical about them. A nice suit or a hair-cut may or may not be irrelevant. What you need to keep in mind is that every aspect of your visualisation has a symbolic meaning with regard to your unconscious. So, it is not so helpful to be too critical about it and it pays to be respectful to it. What do you see in your mind when you are in your best self? How do you look and behave when you are at your peak? You see yourself in sharp suit? Good. No? That's fine too. What is important is how well you are able to communicate with your unconscious.

Vivek.

As I said; the problem isn't visualisation per se, it's this particular exercise. I don't know how to visualise my authentic self, that's the problem. I don't know what it looks like, so it's not flippant to comment on clothing since that's part of the process. I don't consider clothing importamt. I don't follow fashion, so the outward appearance alone is difficult to get past. I don't see myself as anything in this respect. I have never visualised myself in this way so I don't know what I'm trying to see.

There seems to be the possibility that you may have misunderstood Vivekraj in his previous post.

The picture you see when you visualize your higher/ideal/authentic self is really irrelevant at this point because all it is, is a symbol for you to work with. And, especially, for your unconscious mind to work with. Because, that's the level at which the real changes take place and the level at which symbols, metaphors gain immense power.

As long as when you have that picture in your mind you are reminded of everything you stand for, the kind of life you would absolutely love to have, the kind of job, merits, achievements, financial status, character, power, and so forth, that stand in alignment with what you might call "your ideal self", then that's the picture that you would want to choose.

You may even use a metaphor like a lion or a demigod, or anything else that may serve as a symbol for the things listed above (or required in the book that you have). As long as it is compelling to you, it will work. Add, sounds that empower you, colors that mesmerize you, touches, warmth in just the right places, and anything else that you would like.

It's just a mechanism to set a direction for you to follow. There are no rules to follow except for the fact that it must represent, in a way, your ideals.

My recommendation is for you to play, for a while, with the ideas presented by the people that responded to your posts, notice what changes as you're doing that, and then let us know what new things are beginning to unfold in your experience.

Cheers,
James

QUOTE: "As I said; the problem isn't visualisation per se, it's this particular exercise. I don't know how to visualise my authentic self, that's the problem. I don't know what it looks like, so it's not flippant to comment on clothing since that's part of the process. I don't consider clothing importamt. I don't follow fashion, so the outward appearance alone is difficult to get past. I don't see myself as anything in this respect. I have never visualised myself in this way so I don't know what I'm trying to see."

OK, but I guess, you are able to visualise yourself in some way; just may not be your authentic self. There is an option to start small, and then build on it. That is, just visualise yourself in your normal, everyday self. Once you can get past that, then you can start adding small elements to it. You can work both at the level of content as well as structure. For example, try changing your clothing into something you like a little more, but which does not conflict with your idea of not being too fashionable. After you make the change, notice how you feel. This way, you can incrementally work in the level of content. Also, you you can try changing the sub-modalities little bit at a time, to work at the level of structure. Try changing the brightness, or the qualities of sounds (if any) one at a time, and notice how you feel. Also, I strongly recommend you continue listening to the CD regularly. It will help you a lot in changing your unwanted patterns and for building new ones.

Good luck!
Vivek.

It just seems rather superficial, and therfore counter productive, to use appearance - clothing for instance - as a means of generating confidence.