I have decided i need to manage my time better and create goals for each area of my life. The thing is if i make goals and plan everything (with times and dates so i make sure i do them) how do i not make life boring and predictable, if for example i had a plan for completing a goal tonight i can never be spontaneous, if i dont do the goal in my said time and date when will i do it?

I need flexibility in my goals but how?

Flexibility is Weak! That means you not got bones in you! You want goals that are meaning full of incentives to you. Spontaneity got no relations to flexibility or rigidness, as it's sometimes used in several different ways.

Goals, Values or Critterias, Outcomes, end-results, products, etc., - they gotta be clear to you and to have real bones and vigor. There are goals that can't be achieve directly, only indirectly like feelings as been said somewhere.

Managing your time is if you want to set up failure date only and thus is subjective and you only want FEEDBACK to succeed. That's state management, I guess.

I better shut up, 'cuz I don't know what I'm talking about either. Maybe (possibility thinking) someone will enlighten better.

nlpfiend wrote:

I have decided i need to manage my time better and create goals for each area of my life. The thing is if i make goals and plan everything (with times and dates so i make sure i do them) how do i not make life boring and predictable, if for example i had a plan for completing a goal tonight i can never be spontaneous, if i dont do the goal in my said time and date when will i do it?

I need flexibility in my goals but how?

Well perhaps there's a time for planning and following the plan and a time for going with the flow. And there'll no doubt also be times for deviating from the plan - if you plan to calibrate for and elicit feedback in your work.

Having a plan is not the same as having a rigid procedure to follow. You can have plenty of choice points along the way, lots if you chunk the plan at the right level. The key thing is to focus your attention on what you want to achieve, at some given point, and ensure your actions are congruent with that outcome.

You'll notice that some of your bigger goals can be broken down into smaller sets of goals and so on. How far you have to go with this breaking down process will be governed, to an extent, by how much self discipline and expertise, relevant to the task at hand, you possess.

What do you hope to achieve through planning that you currently aren't experiencing ?

Dear Ryan,

Surely spontanaity is in the moment, rather than a behaviour you plan to do this evening ?

So be spontaneous now, if you can be.

With outcomes like,

"how do i not make life boring and predictable, if for example i had a plan for completing a goal tonight i can never be spontaneous"

it may remain challenging however.

With all due respect, I think you are getting yourself tied up with semantics. Is it possible for you to do what you think you have to or want to, and enjoy doing it ?

After all it ain't what you do, it's the way that you do it, right ?

MH

I had fears of spoiling my in-time spontaniety until I trained with Christina Hall and had the realisation that by utilising through time strategies I had more time available to be in the moment...

So I kinda reframed my outlook a little and took the best from both worlds...

And it is more enjoyable because I get the things done I set out to do. So my in-time moments are not with a feeling of guilt afterwards cos I shudda been doing something more productive than having a load of fun...

Wayne

Ryan, I think it would help to know what you mean by "spontaneity." What does it mean to be spontaneous? For instance, if you wanted to play basketball with your friends after they invited you, if you went, is that spontaneous if you didn't have that written into your plan for that day? However, you had to agree on where to meet to play basketball. Isn't that a plan too? Would that be spontaneous or not?

We very seldom just randomly do things. True, we often do things without reflection or an explicit plan, but frequently that means we are doing things out of habit - good or bad. Is that spontaneous?

In this context, it sounds like you want to be free from goal-setting and planning. If that is what you want, then why have you decided to manage your time with plans and goals?

Your stated concern is that you do not want life to be boring and predictable. You don't have to worry about the predictable part: no matter how precise a plan you create, you will never stop life from being unpredictable. You can't stop it from raining if you make a plan to do yard work. You can't stop the toilet from overflowing because you didn't have it on your schedule. You can't stop the power outage because you plan to work on a project on your computer. You can't make life predictable by planning!

You don't want your life to be boring. The answer to that is simply to enjoy the things you are doing - whether planned or not. Part of what NLP allows you to is to have control over your emotions. You can enjoy the things you do - instead of waiting to do the things you find enjoyable, waiting for the weekend to hangout and have fun for instance.

Dasein

nlpfiend wrote:

I have decided i need to manage my time better and create goals for each area of my life. The thing is if i make goals and plan everything (with times and dates so i make sure i do them) how do i not make life boring and predictable, if for example i had a plan for completing a goal tonight i can never be spontaneous, if i dont do the goal in my said time and date when will i do it?

I need flexibility in my goals but how?

Hi Ryan,

As long as you know what road you need to take to get there even if you stop for coffee or a drink or a meal or a rest or anything else on the way, or even even you get lost you will always get back on that road again so I think you are well on your way don't you?

All the best,
Violeta