Hello and thanks for popping in.

I've recently become interested in exploring the ways in which NLP could help me improve my technique, and ultimately, my figures as an estate agent working out of Mayfair in Central London.


I primarily looking for situation that would be very tailored to me. Some aspects I am particularly aware that need looking at are my motivation and confidence, as well as the specific skills to directly improve my sales techniques.

If you can help or can point me in the right direction to find this help I would be very grateful to hear from you.

Many thanks,

Take a look at what I do
Your Life, Your Choice!

I would suggest that you consider going to a seminar rather than 1 on 1 training. A lot of NLP needs to be practised and experienced as you learn it. Learning as part of a group will help you do this. Read "Persuasion Engineering" , at least twice and then go on the course. Persuasion Engineering You can get the book from Amazon. You will also learn a lot from Jamie Smart. Ethical Influence with NLP Bundle with CD Set - £77.00GBP : Salad ltd, NLP training and products Also check out Marc Hogan www.persuasion-skills.co.uk

southnick wrote:

I would suggest that you consider going to a seminar rather than 1 on 1 training. A lot of NLP needs to be practised and experienced as you learn it. Learning as part of a group will help you do this. Read "Persuasion Engineering" , at least twice and then go on the course. Persuasion Engineering You can get the book from Amazon. You will also learn a lot from Jamie Smart. Ethical Influence with NLP Bundle with CD Set - £77.00GBP : Salad ltd, NLP training and products Also check out Marc Hogan www.persuasion-skills.co.uk

Hi Nick,

I'd like to thank you very much for your suggestions. I guess ultimately I'm guilty of wanting to take short cuts. Without falling into a world of excuses (which I hate) I have couple of ongoing situation which prevent me from taking your advice.

I work 12 hour days, 6 days a week, my one day off is 'family time'. Reading for any length of time, barring the 5 minutes in bed before I pass out, has proved impossible! I have tried listening to audio tapes in the car but I work ten minutes away from home, and being an estate agen every journey I make is a short hop to the next flat!

In terms of taking a fully fledged course I have some financial constraints which make spending 000's extremely difficult. I suppose it's easy to argue the investment angle, but if I could I would have by now. I have spoken to a few trainers, but wow(!) some of the fees asked have been extraordinary. I have no doubt they are worth every penny, but so far it's been tough.

The idea of working one to one came to me as a way of "spreading" my costs whilst trying to find someone who could really focus their teaching to me... selfish I know!

I suppose I have a real problem at the moment in that my 'skills' aren't sharp enough, the market is pretty tough, and I am frankly struggling to make ends meet at the moment . What's interesting though is there are people in my office doing very well and I believe that this has to do with some form of NLP, whether learnt or inherent.

Hi Fabrizio,
Couple of things I'd like to say based on your apparent constraints....NLP evolved from asking skilled people HOW they do what they do so well and paying attention to how they move ,think and speak, to be curious about learning How things are done by those who seem to do things so easily....so these people who seem to be doing very well are well worth speaking with to find out how they know what to do when, then the rest is paying attention opening your eyes and ears and learning from people who are worth learning from. Its free and only requires making people feel good about talking with you and telling you things ....the question is what are your work colleges doing thats different from what your doing and how do you learn from that...
have Fun

Fabrizio

Can I just clarify?
So what you're saying is that you want to improve, but you aren't prepared to spend any time, effort or money to achieve that, yes?

That maybe you really aren't worth that investment, yes?

And, your family, whom you are presumably working so hard to support, they aren't worth that extra effort either, yes?

You'd sooner just keep complaining as you watch it all go down the toilet, rather than invest in any meaningful way in your future, yes?

Don't get me wrong, I'm not having a go at you, I'm just giving you some feedback on what you've written so far. Because you really do sound like a no-hope case right now!
Is that correct? Is that what you are Fabrizio? Really?

(And if it is, I really don't mind if you want to stay that way, that is entirely up to you. So please don't feel any need to defend that, I'm 100% fine with it...
I'm not really very sure that you are fine with it though, are you...? )

I also don't mind if you get really angry about what I'm saying to you right now, so go ahead, knock yourself out! Go for it. Have free rant on me - my treat.

In fact I actually really want you to feel just how much power your anger has, and how much power you are wasting every time you invest your energy unwisely, instead of constructively.

And I want you to realise that you are spending real energy getting angry and frustrated, being pathetic, making excuses, avoiding being successful, feeling guilty and inadequate, not to mention scrounging about for free help on the internet, and guess what? I totally understand why you are doing that. I've been there myself, so I get it. I really do...

I also understand that it will never get you anywhere, except deeper into the bogged down state you are in already!

Fabrizio, I want you to know how strong and how powerful you could be if you just stopped whining and focussed intelligently on what you do want, rather than on what you don't want...

You see, I would really like to help you, but I have a personal rule - I will only help people who are prepared to change, people who will make the effort to put into action positive strategies, work at it, and who value what I do sufficiently to pay a professional rate for it.
Do you sell houses for peanuts commissions? I'm guessing not.
I don't help people create magnificent futures for peanuts either. Nor does any other change worker who's worth listening to.

Anyway, I'm not actually really trying to get your business for myself. I only do a very small amount of one to one coaching work... Notice, no link to a fancy website, no hard sell. I'm quite happy keeping all my strategies and methods for myself, and those who are prepared to invest in their future growth and happiness, of course.

All I can say is that I hope you do invest your time, effort and money with somebody somewhere, because you really can totally change your life, whenever you're ready to do that.

Good luck and best regards

Nigel

Nigel Adams wrote:

Fabrizio

Can I just clarify?
So what you're saying is that you want to improve, but you aren't prepared to spend any time, effort or money to achieve that, yes?

That maybe you really aren't worth that investment, yes?

And, your family, whom you are presumably working so hard to support, they aren't worth that extra effort either, yes?

You'd sooner just keep complaining as you watch it all go down the toilet, rather than invest in any meaningful way in your future, yes?

Don't get me wrong, I'm not having a go at you, I'm just giving you some feedback on what you've written so far. Because you really do sound like a no-hope case right now!
Is that correct? Is that what you are Fabrizio? Really?

(And if it is, I really don't mind if you want to stay that way, that is entirely up to you. So please don't feel any need to defend that, I'm 100% fine with it...
I'm not really very sure that you are fine with it though, are you...? )

I also don't mind if you get really angry about what I'm saying to you right now, so go ahead, knock yourself out! Go for it. Have free rant on me - my treat.

In fact I actually really want you to feel just how much power your anger has, and how much power you are wasting every time you invest your energy unwisely, instead of constructively.

And I want you to realise that you are spending real energy getting angry and frustrated, being pathetic, making excuses, avoiding being successful, feeling guilty and inadequate, not to mention scrounging about for free help on the internet, and guess what? I totally understand why you are doing that. I've been there myself, so I get it. I really do...

I also understand that it will never get you anywhere, except deeper into the bogged down state you are in already!

Fabrizio, I want you to know how strong and how powerful you could be if you just stopped whining and focussed intelligently on what you do want, rather than on what you don't want...

You see, I would really like to help you, but I have a personal rule - I will only help people who are prepared to change, people who will make the effort to put into action positive strategies, work at it, and who value what I do sufficiently to pay a professional rate for it.
Do you sell houses for peanuts commissions? I'm guessing not.
I don't help people create magnificent futures for peanuts either. Nor does any other change worker who's worth listening to.

Anyway, I'm not actually really trying to get your business for myself. I only do a very small amount of one to one coaching work... Notice, no link to a fancy website, no hard sell. I'm quite happy keeping all my strategies and methods for myself, and those who are prepared to invest in their future growth and happiness, of course.

All I can say is that I hope you do invest your time, effort and money with somebody somewhere, because you really can totally change your life, whenever you're ready to do that.

Good luck and best regards

Nigel

Hi Nigel,

thanks for the response. I appreciate you taking the time to challenge me.

I was quite interested in your response because it seems to presuppose that I haven't already thought about things you mention!

I don't see a great deal of whining in what I say. I merely am trying to find a way of making things work within the constraints that I have at present. These are very real. Whether I like it or not, I have financial constraints! Not much I can do about that: I can't magic money despite my best efforts.

The last person I spoke with wanted £200 per hour once a week. I have no doubt that they achieve that all the time. But in my mind I do the basic math, that's a whopping £800 per month. That's almost my mortgage payment! Now I also have to consider that even if the 1st hour sees instant improvement in my performace: it can take 2-3 months for a deal to come through into money in my pocket: Here lies the problem! Three months of paying out 800 p/m before anything back would mean I default on many of my other commitments ( and please don't say that I should prioritse; I do!)

I'm not angry. What you say is perfectly true. I realise what the benefits could be; I wouldn't be here, interested in what I can achieve, if I were not. I realise that first and foremost the change has to begin internally. Well if ever I was prepared to do that, it's now.

Saying I don't want to change sounds a tad ridiculous to me. I see the problems I face clearly. I also know that my lack of success is down to me and me alone. Any suggestion otherwise seems to me to suit you as it gives you a stance to push me from. Believe me, change is the one thing I am desperate to bring about right now.


All the best,

Fabrizio

Hi Fabrizo,

I understand the financial constraints. I have been there many times myself, however I have a suggestion that may well deal with the money and the time.

If you buy a copy of "persuasion Engineering it will cost you £23.99 and I believe that if you read it you will start looking at sales slightly differently. That is not a big investment and even if you put it on a credit card and leave it there for 3 months the interest is not going to kill you. If even this investment is too great then you have more pressing calls on your time than reading an internet forum.

When I started my business over 20 years ago, I used to work till 12 every night and sometimes till 3 or 4 in the morning when times were hard. I don't think it made the business more successful, in fact I know the opposite was true, but I felt that as long as I was busy then it wasn't my fault that I was making little money. There came a time when I changed the way I worked. I began to work a normal day, with occasional extra hours on rare occasions when it was necessary. The result of this was that my business became more successful. I was working to get things done, rather than to stop me feeling bad.

I don't know your work patterns but I would be willing to bet that you have at least an hour a day that doesn't bring you extra business. You spend that keeping busy so you don't feel guilty about the poor sales.

If you were to spend that hour relaxing, at the gym or sitting in the park you would give yourself the chance to look at your day from a slight distance. That distance will make you so much more effective. You will make more sales.

What about if you spent 30 mins of that hour reading the book? Things would be even better.

I suspect that at the moment you are so overwhelmed that aren't thinking about what you do. You are just keeping busy.

In Persuasion engineering they talk about how easy they found it selling gas guzzling luxury cars in the middle of a fuel shortage and a recession in the 70s. They just looked at the problem slightly differently, that is what you need to do.

What you're doing at the moment isn't working so try something different.


Have fun.

Nick

Definetly get a copy of Persuasion Engineering either DVD or book. It will make you far more money than anyone who charges 6 times what the book costs for one hours work who will give you only a tiny amounts of distinctions by comparison. I have some notes from the Persuasion Engineering DVD's. If your interested I can private message them to you, or perhaps post them here if feel comfortable.

Right! I've ordered the book. Should be with me sometime this week!

I'm sure you will find it a good investment and a source of inspiration for new ways to sell.

I suggest that you read it the first time more like a work of fiction than a "How to" book. You will then absorb the ideas without analysing every paragraph for detailed instructions. You will read it much faster too.

HI - I've had a quick look at the responses --

and i have put some recommendations down below however it really has too

BE YOU who takes yourself too the next level. Even if you employ a on-1-one sales coach, the best business coach in the world, go to seminar after seminar - the people with the results are the ones which look at what they are doing wrong and make some fine correction.

The difference between someone like yourself and your sales results and the person who is getting extreme sales results/revenue - its in the little things that they do -- ie making a customer laugh, bring a smile to a customers face, abit more customer service. Can hear the buying signals and probably the most previlent mistake of most sales people "Ask for the sale". There is an ideal time to ask for the sale. NLP helps hone in on these skills.

Get in with some like minded people, people will buy when they are not being pitched a house/product but see that your true to yourself.

hope this helps

southnick wrote:

Also check out Marc Hogan www.persuasion-skills.co.uk

Hi Nick,

Thanks for the mention! As you know persuasion-skills.co.uk is now gone. My new website is www.marchoganonline.com.

Please feel free to check it out, you can also see 4 sample Videos here!

Kind Regards

Marc