Hi

I've just recently found NLP and have started to read up on it after suffering from stress related anxiety towards the end of last year, all bought on just from moving into our first owned home. This anxiety and subsequent depression left me questioning my life/career etc and this is how I found NLP. The anxiety has passed (thank God!) and I feel as though I'm getting through the depression but since starting NLP other issues have arisen and I'm sooo confused! I work from home as a portrait and equestrian artist and find it quite lonely and I have lost all passion for my painting but I have no idea whether to give up and search for another career as painting is the only thing I'm any good at and I do enjoy aspects of working for myself, such as not having to get up at dawn!! I just want to live a life where I'm content and happy and can go a day without being confused and worried. I'm hoping NLP will help me (I'm reading Get The Life You Want by Richard Bandler) but as I'm at the beginning I keep finding I make excuses. Is it wise to seek help from a practitioner just to get myself on the right track and have questions answered or will the NLP start to work if I just give it a lot of time?

Cheers!

Sally

Hi Sally,

Why wait? Sure, it might work if you give it time but what's really been going on here is you've been stopping yourself. There's no need to wait to stop stopping yourself and get going.

You'll get a lot of great advice here and I know what track I'd take if I was coaching you, however personal change is much more effective live than over a forum.

So, simply - yes, I think it's wise to see a practitioner.

Pending that ...

I'm pretty sure the book you're reading has something about 'getting to it'.

I'll offer this is a starter: How will you know when you're living a life where you're content and happy? What will you see? What will you hear? What will you feel? It's a place to start.

Then, my guess is if you've been making excuses, probably you've not been shifting in to the right state. Maybe the state you've been shifting in to is some anxiety about what would happen if you didn't have some anxiety; or some fear about change. I don't know, just guesses. Just examples of the kind of thing that might have been going on. A live practitioner will be able to calculate what's been going on in your 'model' and choose an intervention much faster than a forum can.

But do try out some of the great advice I know you're going to get.

Cheers

Hi Sally.

Nlp is great for getting back on track!
Obviously seeing a practioner is going to be great but reading about NLP can also start shifting beliefs that may be limiting you!

I am a very creative person and can identify wholeheartedly with you when you say that you lose inspiration working from home and find it lonely! Hey do you know what, who wouldn't? To be inspired you have to be motivated excited and ready to go, so I suggest you grab that inspiration from the outside world!

Maybe you could start by structuring your day in a different way, maybe you could get out in the morning join a club or study group, artist group, do something you find stimulating, whatever it is, take that time for yourself to interact with others and you will find that when you do get home,inspiration will follow! Spend some time away from home so that when you're at home you can enjoy and appreciate it!!!

Best Wishes,

Violeta

Thanks for the advice. I've found a local practitioner so am going to arrange to see him. Some of the things you mentioned Steve like some anxiety if I didn't have anxiety; or some fear about change rang true as I spend a lot of my time on my own worrying about "stuff", nothing in particular, just stuff and although I would love to change, I'm worried about doing so, whether I will do so etc. Blimey, I can't imagine not worrying!!! And I completely understand what you mean Violeta (gorgeous name by the way!) about getting out of the house and did try to do so for a while but it fell by the wayside the past couple of weeks. I have days where I can barely face painting let alone leaving the house but I suppose I will have those days now and then and musn't let them rule me.

Cheers

Sally

Hi Sally,

That's Great !!

When you rule good and Cool things happen, don't they?
Keep in touch,

Violeta

Hi Sally ,I can understand you feel lonely working at home as Violeta ,my sister says it really is important that you GET OUT and only then will you be able to enjoy the house ..
It seems like you are looking for a new passion and I'm pretty sure you're unconscious mind has taken you right where you needed to be at this moment in your journey .
OH and by the way you're be great at nlp as you are already great at observation and you have already experienced trance as you paint !
There are exicting times waiting for you..

I hope you're still reading the Bandler book, and here's the important part: do the fun stuff at the end of the chapters that will actually help you learn to run your own brain. There's no substitute for doing. If making excuses isn't working out for you, it's time to do something different. Did I mention there's no substitute for doing?

And I think seeing an NLP practitioner might be a very good idea, too, especially if you can get a recommendation from someone you know. Change can be delightfully fast once you start doing it.

I saw a practitioner yesterday morning and am feeling much better today already! He worked on giving my memory a clean up so then I can get on with things without having bad memories popping up when not needed and I can already feel a weight off my mind and body. I have plans to start going to fitness classes, I find finding things to do outside the house difficult but only because I've not really had hobbies before so now I'm finally feeling up to giving things a go, I'm going to! And I'm definitely sticking with the Richard Bandler book, it's been a great source of learning for me.

Is it usual to find the change quite strange to start with? I keep expecting to have anxious thoughts popping back into my head as it's been going on so long and when they don't it's quite odd, but I'm not going to stop the positive thoughts!!

Well, 'strange' is a word that means different things to different people. If you mean strange as in 'unusual', 'unfamiliar', then I'd say that is a reasonable way of describing how it might feel just after making a new change. I mean, you wouldn't want to change and stay the same. So if you're feeling some unusualness, unfamiliarity, I'd say that's a good way of knowing there's something new happening and some change has been made - and that's encouraging. What's unfamiliar at first will become very familiar as it becomes the new norm.

Cheers

salsportraits wrote:

Is it wise to seek help from a practitioner just to get myself on the right track and have questions answered or will the NLP start to work if I just give it a lot of time?

What kind of help do you have in mind?

NLP is simply a specific method of modeling, which has thrown up a variety of techniques and applications - most of them intially designed to aid in the modeling process.

NLP is categorically not a form of therapy, though many of the techniques can be used to aid in the therapeutic context - as well as in business, education, coaching, etc., etc.

If you want help getting to understand NLP then I'd recommend an NLP training course rather than just looking up an NLP practitioner, since an NLP practitioner is literally just someone who has complete the basic training. There is no guarantee that a "practitioner" has done anything other than turn up for each day of the course. There's no guarantee that you'll get genuine NLP as distinct from the very personal ideas of someone ho once went on an NLP course.

If you go on a course run by someone sanctioned by the Society of NLP (Bandler's organization) or by the International Training Academy of NLP (Grinder's organization), on the other hand, you should get the real deal.

Hope this is of use

Be well

Andy B.

Hi Sally,

You sound like a new person already! I think that you, should join a fitness class as exercise really boosts your endormophines and not only will you feel great but you will look great too!

Life is simple and easy when you know how to make it simple and easy...

I wish you all the best!

Violeta

Sally,

Welcome to the forum and also to the marvelous technology that is NLP....

I once heard Richard Bandler say (something like) "most people are under the misconception that.... you have to DO SOMETHING to FEEL GOOD...... and that is just not the case you by educating your unconscious you can HAVE THE GOOD FEELING first...... then just enjoy what ever it is you decide to do....."

Now!!..... I may not have got this exactly right as it was a long time ago but I think that I am in the right ball park...

You will find that within the technology of NLP there are techniques to assist you to build and....... generate positive feelings...... as you open your eyes first thing in the morning and imaging this........ they just get better and better, brighter and brighter, stronger and stronger......

You will be pleasently surprised as you learn faster and easier ways to...... just feel good...... because your brain works faster then you think.....


All The best,


Jason

Strangely I read Jason's post and I...feel fantastic!