Hello peeps!
Just wondering what you think of an anchoring experiment Im doing. Obviously I'm not expecting instant results and will need to persevere and see for myself what happens, but wanted to know if it sounds like a goos idea or not:

I have a problem with public speaking, (and also general miserableness at the moment) and thought Id try anchoring to get myself into a better state. Well, I tried my hardest to elicit a super-confident memory/state, but couldnt get it strong enough, so I had an idea to watch hilarious cartoons/stand-up comedians etc on YouTube, and chew gum at the same time for my anchor. Then I'll pop some chewing gum in just before any meetings/whatever, and .. hopefully just not take the whole thing too seriously - (hopefully not collapse in a heap of inappropriate giggles)

What say you? Do you think it will work?
Cheers!
A

Ang,

That seems like a lot of work. Instead of trying to make sure you get into a specific state to speak in public, it might be much simpler to use collapse anchors to alter the state you currently go into that you don't like.

When you have a pile of sh$t, it can be more work to cover it up than to just remove the pile of sh$t.

Try this if you like:

Make a list of what you feel when you think about or get ready to speak to a group.

Anchor these feelings and in addition anchor some of the following:

• the feeling of speaking to someone one-on-one
• blowing a bubble and it popping and going all over your face
• speaking in front of a group and intentionally letting out a loud fart
• taking a nice stroll by yourself
• the feeling you get when you meet or see someone you consider "special" (celebrity, etc.)
• the feeling you get when you complete a puzzle or crossword puzzle or answer a question correctly
• speaking in front of a group with your pants unzipped
• driving really fast
• running
• confused
• really hungry
• when you get out of the shower and you smell all nice and clean
• what you feel when a tv show or movie really has your attention

These are a starting point. I'm sure you can come up with many more. You should be able to anchor 16 of these on one hand and then collapse them all together. Then set another 16 on the other hand and collapse them all together. Then collapse all 32 together by sitting on both hands at once.

There is something physical you can do that will get you in a great state.
What is it for you?

Dance around to a song you love. Something in nature often does it, visit the sea, walk up a hill. Going to the gym. Digging in the garden. A bike ride.

Try the Circle of Excellence-Peace

Re: Public speaking - the more times you do it, the better you will get at it and the less resistance you will feel to doing it....

unfortunately though... Re: General Miserableness - guess what? Yep, "the more times you do it, the better you will get at it and the less resistance you will feel to doing it...

When I speak publicly (most days, these days) if I experience any resistance I just lightly touch my centre (belly) and ground my energy through my feet, soften my knees and take a conscious breath, remind myself to keep breathing and grounding unconsciously, slow down and relax - give a big smile, pause and then get on with it. Every time I start resisting I just pause to remind myself not to take it seriously and pick a new point or area of focus in my audience then carry on...

Hope that helps

:cool:

Thanks guys!

..Oz - I'm a proper NLP novice, so I'm not sure what you mean.. I also thought that instead of trying to 'get rid' of a bad habit, it was a lot easier to squash it out the picture by developing good habits! No?.. I dont understad the collapsing technique, and can you explain the thinking behind anchoring bad feelings - I thought that was a big no-no!! The thoughts and feelings I get when I think about public speaking are: "Oh, good God this is going to be awful", I see and feel myself blushing and then losing my focus, getting very embarrassed, people looking at me in bemusement and pity.. "How can I get out of this? Can I pull a sicky? Can I quit my job? Can I leave the country?" Sometimes I wish a disaster to happen so I dont have to do it!! Awful. And all the more awful is that I used to be FINE with public speaking, no probs, infact I used to enjoy it and had no patience for people who were shy about it. I know this part of me is still there, its not the speaking I have a problem with, its all the eyes on me, and then the god-awful blushing, which totally puts me off everything.

Southnick - I like your suggestions, it's my kind of thinking too. I reckon if I filled up my time doing these things instead of worrying, the issue may wither without the attention Im lavishing on it..

nlpal - I have tried the circle of excellence! For some reason, it dont work for me! I cant elicit a strong state of confidence in the first place! Any suggestions?..

Nigel - Thank you for your personal account! good to know Im not alone. Yes youre right, so right about the more times you do something the better you get at it!! Very true for the general miserableness. Ive done that too long, learnt it off someone else in order to please them, and now Im in a right pickle.

What I personally feel needs to happen, is for me to 'forget' the whole concept of being shy and embarrassed and blushing. Its like.. having biscuits in the house: When you know they're there, they keep popping into your head, all through the evening until you have to just have one because its there! The shy thing, the blushing thing, is IN MY HEAD, just behind the surface, ready to go, saying "Use me! Use me!" . Much better to just not buy the biscuits, than to try to hide them (you still know exactly where they are), or eat fruit instead (you still want the biscuit no matter how full on fruit you get). I dont know if this is a naive way of looking at it, but thats how it feels to me so surely there must be something in it.

I know this is straying off the thread somewhat, but IS there a way of hypnotising someone and then giving them a mental block about something? making them forget a limiting and non-useful part of themselves?..

P.s. by the way! For the week that I did the 'experiment', I have to say, I laughed A LOT. Everything at work was funny. Actually verging on hysterical, not incredibly useful! Not sure if it was because I had 'residual mirth' from watching the comedy, or was it down to the anchoring of that state and recreating it. Hmm.

Eliciting a state of confidence should be fairly simple. I am sure there has been many times when you have felt confident. It only has to be a moment and you can stack them. It may be as simple as a time when you were brushing your teeth or eating a sandwich. Sometimes adding color and sound like a humming to the circle to make it more powerful. Imagine using the circle and adjust as necessary. We don't want to "get rid of bad parts", all parts have a positive roll in our lives. Conflict integration and/or conflicting belief process to illicit the positive intent may be useful. Some issues are to big for one simple "magic trick". Hope this helps-Peace

Hi Alice,

I used to have a lot of problems with building strong states too. And one technique I used to build up my states was the following:

1. Stand up, and imagine you're standing on your timeline in the present. The past stretching off behind you and your future in front of you.

2. Imagine a 'you' in one weeks time standing one step in front of you... the you that is very confident. More confident than you have ever been before in the past. Notice what you look like, how you move, how you breathe.

Build up the image of yourself until it is very attractive, you are drawn to be that 'you' in the future.

3. When you're ready, when you're totally drawn to be that 'you,' step forward into that 'you' and notice how wonderful that feels. Stay with those feelings for a few moments.

And then, either:

a. anchor the state, or
b. hold on to that state and step back into the present taking that state with you.

4. Now with those 'new' feelings of confidence, stronger than ever before, within you now... imagine a 'you' in another weeks time one step in front of you. Build up that image.

5. Repeat Step 3 as many times as necessary.

It's like climbing the stairs to stronger and stronger states.

I've found this worked very well for me, I learned this years ago, but I don't remember where it was that I learned it (possibly Robert Dilts).

The good news is that within a short period of time, you learn to access stronger and stronger states whenever you choose.

Good Luck

Tom
Mind Champion

I can relate to your anxiety when speaking in public as this is something i had to get over. The process i used to overcome this was trying to have an out of body experience.

When i was going to speak in public i would get comfortable with the points i had to make - i made myself feel confident i knew the information. Once i had convinced myself i knew the information i used to imagine watching myself on the tv or have a birds eye view of myself public speaking, i would go over the speech [public speaking/meeting] i would make it sound great, imagine me using great body language gestures, wonderful tone, smilling, the look of the audience faces really enjoying my speech.

I would go over and over this process and the more i done this it made me feel as if i was giving the best speech ever and i was such a great public speaker, i would get exited when imagining myself giving this wonderfull speech.

When the time to speak in public i would just imagine the speech i had went over in my head, i would then try and imagine me watching myself from the crowd or on telly, by doing this it gave me the opportunity to observe myself - i could adjust my tone, my body language and i wouldn't have the fear of making a mistake because i was in control to amend any mistakes, i was in power. You simply have to structure your own reality, just iamgine it is you and only you.

This worked really well for me but i would always start off really shaky and after a few minutes i would feel relaxed, so i asked myself "How do i get over this?". I then thought back to reading books on body language, i recalled stuff i read about how body language gestures are wired in the brain from the cave days when we had to fight/attck and protect ourselfs, an example of this when folding our arms we are feeling negative - we are protecting our vital organs as the caveman would of done when he was feeling negative [probably when he was negative he was being attacked by a bear etc]. I immediatley started to think that my anxiety and nerves were actually my bodies natural defense sytem to protect myself, i thought if i am so nervous about speaking in public there must be a chemical reaction in my body that is getting me ready to fight and defend myself as the caveman would do when fighting a bear.

I thought if this chemical reaction happens to me as it does with the caveman fighting the bear then my body is working the way it should, i am simply having anxiety to defend myself. Thats when i welcomed the nerves, i look at it as if my body is that healthy it can look after me and if i didn't have nerves then my body isn't as healthy as it should be.

i worked with a client on his problem to speak read in publich with the fast phobia cure and it worked like a charm for him. :-)

after the fast phobia cure i was working with some ankers.

1. remeber a situation when you have feeled been loved. if he is into the state i told him to make a step and a fist.

2. rember a situation when you have been successful. step. fist.

3. think about speaking/reading in public and make a step and a fist.